Back in January of this year, I attended a youth workers conference in Indianapolis, IN. Among the several workshops I took was one on developing communication skills. The two presenters were a husband and wife team largely known in the youth workers field. For a youth workers conference, they were a lot older than the workshop enrollees; but their body language exuded confidence, experience and a sense of enjoyment in sharing what they’ve learned.
I was surprised to hear that communication is 99% body language and only 1% verbal. I’m not sure how accurate that is or what tests prove that. But during the class we engaged in several body language exercises that prove this principal.
In one exercise, each of the students in the workshop lined up against the wall. One by one, we simply walked to the podium and introduced ourselves as we were being recorded by video. We were told to simply say our name, what state we came from and our job title. We were warned that a bright spot light would be shining on us when we stood up on the podium. They encouraged us to ignore the bright light.
When it was my turn, I gave my best greeting and felt confident it stood out from everyone else’s. But, during video playback we were told that no audio would be played. The instructors wanted us to see what our body language was communicating. Very interesting observations were made. The body language of many told how the light did distract them. Some consciously or unconsciously raised their hand to shield their eyes from the light.
A good amount of people used hand gestures during their greeting. A majority of people seemed unanimated, moving their lips but not their head or eyes.
When it was my turn, I was expecting a lot more than what the others presented. Instead, I too seemed unanimated. My overall body language came across as not wanting to be at the workshop, which is exactly how I felt deep inside. I was deeply disappointed at myself and wondered how many times I stood in front of people thinking I was inspirational but in reality the opposite.
Consciously, I now strive to be like the handful of animated peers in that workshop. There were about five individuals that were truly charismatic in their body language. I still remember one, stepping up to the podium and taking the mike with gusto. While looking at the camera and audience, he gestured with his head a hello by nodding his head up quickly. Everyone laughed when he did that because it truly stood out from everyone else.
Another long lasting principal I remember from the workshop, because I wrote it down of course; is that we remember the mannerisms of a speaker more than their speech. When you think of a recent sermon or presentation you heard, what do you remember? Do you remember the whole message or the way it was presented?
Sincerely
Sheria Kakindo
http://www.scotnetwork.com
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By , July 22nd, 2010,in Body Language Video »Tags: body language, job interview, learn body language, understand body language | No Comments »
By John Tierman
If you want to succeed at attracting women, lose the pick-up lines are out and learn how to use flirting body language. Communication experts tell us that most meaning is conveyed by body language, not words. Here are some reasons why this seduction tool is so powerful.
To begin, you can flirt with a woman from the other side of a room with little risk just by showing her you’re interested. Second, a woman will feel more comfortable talking to a guy who’s already showing signs of being interested. Third, if you get a positive response to your flirting you know you can proceed with less chance of rejection. So how can you use flirting body language signals to communicate to women that you’re a single guy who’s out to interact and have fun? Here are three tips.
Maintain an Available Stance
While it’s true that women are more aware of body language, even guys can interpret some signals intuitively. For example, if a guy is sitting at a bar focusing on his drink, you don’t need to be a body language expert to sense that this guy wants to be left alone. Most of us would decide that someone siting like that isn’t interested in socializing. if you’re interested in meeting woman, that’s a posture to avoid.
You have to face the crowd even if you’re alone.
An upright posture gives off the most positive message. Make brief eye contact with women who happen to look your way. There’s a bit of timing with this. Lock eyes for a moment or two then look away.
Also maintain a friendly and open demeanor if a woman happens to walk past. Just smile and say hello but don’t try to strike up a conversation. Using this type of open and friendly body language is a solid flirting foundation.
Use a Flirting Classic
Winking may sound a little old fashioned, but there’s a reason it’s a classic flirting move – it works. However you have to do it right or you can come off a little bit creepy. It’s simple to do it right, but a lot of guys mess up. Here’s the tip: make eye contact,smile before you wink, wink, then break eye contact. If you are with a group of friends you can simply return to their conversation.
This works well where it would be awkward to approach a woman more directly. This could happen if she’s engaged in a conversation already or sitting with a group. By winking, you’ve made her curious and more likely to be interested in meeting you later. For that matter, some women will come over to chat with you almost immediately
Use Head Tilt
Let’s face it: most people’s favorite subject is themselves and they respond positively to someone who is interested in them. You can use body language to create this strong non-verbal message by tilting your head as a woman speaks to you. A head tilt is a posture of interest.
Of course, it’s also useful to note if she tilts her head as you talk.
All these body language cues help when you want to establish rapport with women.
There is another very important use of body language. As you may have heard, women are attracted to “Alpha” males. That is, men who radiate leadership and confidence. This is very powerful knowledge because this attraction is biologic in origin. It stems from our genetic history when a woman needed a strong male to protect her in a physically dangerous world. As much as culture and society has changed, the basic biology has not. Women are still attracted to Alpha males whether they admit it or not.
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By , July 21st, 2010,in Flirting Body Language »Tags: attracting women, body language, flirting, Flirting Body Language | No Comments »
I just watched a show on the secrets of body language on the history channel and found the information fascinating. Researchers report that 93% of all communication is non-verbal. That’s right, only 7% of communication is based on our words, yet that’s what most of us focus on. The rest is through gesture, facial expression, pitch, tone of voice, body movement, and posture.
One of the most fascinating segments on the show was the segment based on analyzing politicians. This part was very interesting, especially when it showed world leaders jockeying for position in different scenarios.
When shaking hands, the hand on top or in front has more control. For this politicians jockey to be on the right so their hand is on top. And when one politician pats another on the back, the one patting has more power, so they maneuver to put themselves in position to be the one patting, or maneuver to make sure the other one can’t pat them on the back.
Did you know the last politician going through a door has the most power? They certainly know it. Video clips of politicians maneuvering to be last through a door was fascinating. In one video, Ehud Barak and Yasser Arafat almost started fist fighting over who was going to be last through a door.
If you are in sales, learning the secrets of body language is essential if you want to make more sales. There was an excellent section on selling. People buy not based on the product, they don’t even buy based on the data of the product. They buy based on how they feel about the salesman. If you are in sales, how do your customers feel about you?
If you are in sales you must have a genuine smile, and natural confidence but not over confidence or you’ll come across as arrogant. And you don’t want to appear distant.
Establishing rapport is crucial in politics and sales. Bill Clinton was great at establishing rapport. He had the classic charismatic factors such as likability, power, and attractiveness. He was a powerhouse, coming across as very open with nothing to hide.
Knowing the secrets of body language is also essential if you want to be a great speaker. There are some things all great speakers do. First and foremost, every great speaker who speaks formally expresses from the heart. And their face, head, gestures, and body are in alignment to signify integrity. In another interesting video clip, it was interesting to note how these were not in alignment when Bill Clinton first addressed the “intern incident”.
Next time you are speaking, either in person or in an online video, don’t just focus on your words, focus on the other 93% of communication. Think about what your gestures, facial expression, tone of voice, and posture are conveying to your audience.
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Karen Sielski is a passionate online wealth builder, self proclaimed cool mom, tennis enthusiast, and founder of Autopilot Online Success. She uses her 20+ years in the high-tech industry to help small businesses, entrepreneurs, and online network marketers successfully grow their businesses online. She has a Masters Degree in Computer Science and owns a successful online business.
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By , July 8th, 2010,in Body Language Video »Tags: body language, body movement, communication, facial expression, gestures, tone of voice | No Comments »
When George Washington crossed the Delaware, according to the famous painting, he was showing a body language stance of confidence. He did this by standing erect with his hands on his hips. There is evidence of the same stance by Woodrow Wilson during a time when he was lecturing at a university and by Walter Mondale during his presidential campaign.
Many presidents and presidential hopefuls have shown body language signs of confidence and dominance. In the 1992 presidential debates, much of this was going on. Former President Bill Clinton, Ross Perot, and former President George Bush were all showing a palms down gesture that symbolized their belief in their superiority.
Another nonverbal cue of body language is a way you tilt your head back and hold it there. This has shown up in speeches by Mussolini, Roosevelt, George Wallace, and even Al Gore. It symbolizes a feeling of being disdainful, arrogant, and superior.
Sometimes, body language shows how uncomfortable a politician is. In 1988, former Vice President Dan Quayle was speaking in a televised debate. His opponent came out with a rather cutting remark, and Quayle’s response was an immediate “Adam’s apple jump.” This is a classic sign of nervousness.
The angle that you put yourself in relationship to others is a part of body language. Former President Richard Nixon was known for being uncomfortable around people. This was shown in the way he set himself at a ninety degree angle to others he was dealing with.
Much has been made of a 1988 Time magazine cover photo. It shows Jesse Jackson, who was making a run for president at the time. He is standing with his arms crossed in front of his chest. Some say this is a classic defensive pose. This may or may not be a correct interpretation of his body language.
A tense, pouting mouth can show uncertainty, frustration, and sadness. Photos were taken of former President Bill Clinton during the Monica Lewinsky ordeal. In them he is often displaying such a form of body language.
Former President Ronald Reagan and the Russian leader Mikhail Gorbachev had important matters to discuss at summit. There were times when they did not agree. However, when they did agree, their body language showed it. At such times, they would face each other. They would also sit in similar postures.
A Republican pollster, R. Teeter, did an experiment about body language in politics. He showed people visual footage of politicians campaigning. They were doing their usual speech-making, hand shaking, and the rest. There was no sound, only video.
As it turned out, those who had only the body language of the candidates to read rated them the same way as those who knew their politics and views. It was shown that a lot is determined about choice of candidate by body language alone.
Body language has played a part in American politics and will continue to do so. As long as American people can see who they’re voting for, they will watch as much as they will listen. Thanks to body language, leaders are easier to judge. It is better to read body language from those who are in the public eye. Many of these leaders gives a new meaning to “jugde a book by its cover”, literally. Making decisions on a persons body language is more important than words speaking. Visit [http://www.essiesproducts.com] and find more stuff that translate to you.
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By , April 12th, 2010,in Body Language Video »Tags: body language, body parts, communicate, figure, saying, sharing and teasing, speak, talk, talk to someone | No Comments »
Flirting is an art of communication in human beings, it is a way to bond with another person through a fun and harmless manner. Body language is yet another way to communicate your pleasure or the lack of it to another person subtly and often semi-consciously through your body gestures and movements.
Body language could be delivered by any moving parts of your external body such as your fingers, hands, legs, eye contact and even your smiles. Flirting is one form of body language, expressed to a person of the same or opposite sex, normally when you are interested in that person and are keen to find out more about that person.
A strong indication of flirting using your body language is through your eye contact with another person. For example if a lady makes eye contact with you, gives off a friendly smile and holds that eye contact with you for a prolonged period, this could mean she is taking notice of you, especially in a crowded or social setting, and she likes what she sees in you, it could be what you are wearing or if could be your appearance.
Keep the eye contact until she breaks it off by dropping her gaze to perhaps looking at her hands or lap. This says, “I will not repel you if you come near me.” It is a subconscious female body language of flirting! If the female promptly looks away disinterested after the eye contact is established, stay away! Body language is a funny old thing, sometimes you get it right, other times you mis-read the signs.
To approach a female, the first impression always lasts, so stand straight, chest out, look relaxed but confident, maintain your good body language. Anything that resembles a swagger or arrogance is an immediate put off, so do not cross your arms, looked stressed, talk loudly or use over-the-top hand gestures, stay relaxed and upbeat. Teasing is another body language example of flirting. This does not mean the kind of teasing that hurts or insults a person’s intelligence and integrity, but friendly and neutral teasing that both parties enjoy and can laugh together about.
A friendly tease could be by way of casual tickling, cuddling, hugging, patting on the head, arm resting on your shoulders or frequent gentle touches on parts of the body in a non-offensive way. More intense flirting body language could include someone gazing lovingly into your eyes and holding that one-to-one eye contact for a long period of time, gentle soft kisses, whispering into each other’s ears, someone holding your hands gently and close body contact that both parties enjoy without feeling being threatened or offended. The language spoken when flirting could be fun and friendly, or it could be the romantic and intense kind when a person is taking a real keen interest on you. Most flirting is done when someone is having fun and enjoys the company of someone else. It does not normally have any long lasting effect.
Many singles flirt to have a bit of harmless fun. When flirting is reciprocated, and both parties detect a mutual attraction to one another, that is when casual flirting can quickly turn into a romantic relationship. Have fun studying the body language of flirting!
For more dating and relationship articles please visit us at Relationship Advice, or for more examples on Flirting, have a look at Teen Flirting Tips.
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By , April 10th, 2010,in Flirting Body Language »Tags: body language, Dating, eye contact, flirting | No Comments »
Body Language and Video Conferencing
By David Byrd
As tone and inflection are to an audio conference call, so body language and facial expressions are to a video conference. What kind of information do we give away during a video conference, even if we don’t speak? What can people deduce about us if they simply watch our gestures?
Reading what isn’t being said is a big part of business, of life. Even when we are not looking for signs and indicators, we still read what the other person’s body is saying, and we act and feel accordingly. If you are on a date and the other person sits with crossed arms and is continually scanning the crowd, you don’t need any hints from this article to know that person isn’t into you.
What does this have to do with video conferencing, you ask? Some people think that in a video conference the view is too choppy or small to read body language. They believe that you only look at someone’s head most of the time. Well, times have changed and technology has gotten better. While you could have still picked up on some overt nuances on the old technology, now you get clear a view. And if you only see a face, well, that’s where all the facial expressions are.
Paying attention to your own signals, your own habits is a great way to learn about others. For instance, constantly touching your face or hunching over tells someone you are not confident. Instead, keep your posture straight, and practice holding your hands in your lap. It’s easier in a video conference: just keep your hands off-camera.
As you realize more of what kind of non-verbal signals you’re sending, you may wish to control them better, or use them more effectively. The first step is to spend some time talking in a mirror. Better yet, turn on your web cam and record yourself talking naturally-and gesturing naturally-for a few minutes. Then when you review the recording, you’ll see exactly what you look like on a video conference. Now how can you make improvements?
Watch the recording again, but this time ignore everything but your left hand. Try to take note of all the gestures that you make with that hand. Imagine that the hand is someone else’s. What kind of messages and non-verbal cues are you getting from that hand? Repeat the process with your other visible body parts.
Now it’s time to run the recording, but watching your entire body now. Attitude and meaning don’t come from just one part of your body; it’s the whole package that sends the message. It’s good to keep this in mind, especially if you are working to create or perfect a particular gesture or tone. If the gesture doesn’t match the rest of what your body is saying, then it will look false or fake. At the very least you’ll be sending mixed messages.
If you have spent a lot of time practicing gestures or studying your body language, the next time you are on a video conference, try not to be hyper aware of where your hands are, how you are sitting, and what expression is on your face. If you are concentrating on yourself, your body language will come off unnatural and canned. Also, you will miss what the other person is saying… verbally or non-verbally.
David Byrd is the teleconference expert at Accuconference.
Read more from David or find out about our teleconference service at Accuconference.com.
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By , March 31st, 2010,in Body Language Video »Tags: body language, teleconference, teleconference service, video conference, web conferencing, webinars | No Comments »